“YOU ARE SUCH A BOY!” He said.

Who says girls can not play video games or love soccer?

    Yesterday when I was on the train I took a sit next to an old man. Although my commute is only ten minutes I usually spend my time in something interesting, and this is definitely not just seeing people coming in and out. So yesterday, I was glueing stickers of my Panini Rusia 2018 album and playing RoadFighter on my phone. As I mentioned before, my commute is pretty short, but the old man sitting close to me thought it was enough time to said me the next five words which inspired me to write this entrance:

“YOU ARE SUCH A BOY!”

     More than 24 hour later I can not believe this. Really? Maybe if we were in another country or a different city this could be at least “acceptable”; because, I know every city and each culture has a different development, but here? In the heart of Manhattan? That is completely unacceptable for me. 

     Of course, that was like a loop in my mind, and let me know how different could be the world for boys and girls. I know, This is nothing new. But the point here is, he has no idea how powerful can be his words for some people neither the big difference that he could make if people like him just make sure of their thought before let them go out through their mouth. Nowadays the society is more open mind, but, even that is not enough, we have to learn and practice more things. Many parents thinks is fine if girls wants to play cars or if boys wants to play dolls, and I absolutely agree. But this is not the only path when they have to make a choose. And we can not forget that today kid’s mind is more complex than ours were.

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     I do not have kids yet and I do not want them at least for the next 5 years, but most of my friends and family took this decision already and now they are waiting for their babies. That is why I want to mention this issue, which is not over in our minds yet. When I was child, my parents taught me about doing things that I want to do instead of the things that I have to do, I mean, they always let me choose to do things by my own will and not by imposition with almost everything. Now I am completely and definitely thankful for that with them. And, I am sure that was one of the most important reasons to be who I am now. They always said “If you don’t want to do it, its ok, do not do it, but give me a real and powerful reason for do not do it”. So, that was the philosophy I grow up with, and to be honest… I really love it with my whole soul and heart!

     A lot of people say kids has to obey their parent does not matter if they are right or wrong. In our family, we does not think in that way. Thanks God! But, we think is very important to listen the people, their needs, their wishes and their opinions. Maybe if that old man in the train was thinking like us, he would though twice before calling me “boy”. Which does not bother me, absolutely not! but, it make me think about the type of adults who are shaping our children. I guess that man is the kind of person who thinks girls can not drive, drink, decide and think by them-self. Big mistake, Sr! I am awareness most of the old people are thinking in the same wrong way, and I am pretty sure I could not change their minds but, I hope someone who read this article, give themselves the opportunity to re-evaluate their thoughts and acts.

    Coming back to the main idea, some times we think life is establishing in a specific way,  girls should love the pink color and boys blue one. Girls should wish be mothers and boys should to wish a successful job and a cool car. Girls should be a princess and boys a wholes Casanova. Girls should not stop to talking and boys should not stop to play video games or watch soccer. Of course not!. I believe we should be open mind about the children or teenagers likes, but we have to be alert to their acts and their behavior. It is not only about say “She is not a princess because she loves cars” or “He is not a male chauvinist because he is helping with the errands and chores” Most of the times, those extreme asseverations could be a reason of confusion for our teenagers. 

     Hence, this is not a about telling women make the opposite things or to be against of the society, neither is about telling mans stop judging or looking at women as if they were less than them. Is only about share with your family and friends using simple samples that nowadays the “feminist” or “sexism” are not ways that you have to decide or take. Both of them are just two words which are marking our pass, our history and our present but is only our option to build a future based in those but not only with those. Is our decision stop arguing with people who think different, because nobody is force to think like us, but everybody deserve to be heard.

 

***You can find the Spanish version in my previous post.***


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